Angela's Ashes by Frank McCourt

This is a fantastic, horrifying tale of a boy stuck in a childhood of poverty and alcoholism. It is by far the most depressing book I have ever had the pleasure of reading. I read most of the book the Friday night after we chose our memoirs because it was almost impossible to put down. McCourt's writing style is fantastic, flowing, and flawless. The biggest quirk of this book is that there are no quotation marks around the dialogue, something I initially thought would bother me throughout the book. However, McCourt's story is so gripping, and his writing so great that it is hard to pay attention to it. It perhaps even enhances the story, allowing it to flow better. This book was so immersing that when I was on the turbulent loving plane ride to and from Minneapolis, I stopped worrying about how I was about to perish because of the terrible pilots that seemed to know nothing about flying. McCourt's story is truly amazing, and it's a wonder he's alive to tell the tale today with the childhood he had. McCourt had a couple of serious illnesses, deaths of siblings from malnutrition, and on top of that, he was starving all the time because his distant alcoholic father drank away their food. Angela, McCourt's mother, was no help in this, with her bouts of depression and melancholy in light of this terrible condition that her family was in. Through all of  this, he tells his story with poise and dark humor. It such a great book I cannot praise it enough. As the cliche goes, it will make you laugh, and make you cry, and put your "horrible" life in perspective of what a broken home is really like.

Bless Me, Ultima: Chapters 17-22

I am not too pleased with the ending of this story. There isn't really any indication of what Tony is going to do with his life, except that he definitely isn't going to be a Priest, a cowboy, or a Mini Ultima. I never thought that Tony would do as his father wanted, he always seemed to deep in meaningful thought for a rowdy life as a cowboy free on the plains. But for a while the priest thing was going well, until he made communion. And honestly no wonder he didn't want to become a priest any more. The kids that made him play priest caused Tony to realize that people would want him to condem others, rather than save them. He's too gentle for that. The priest who was teaching them for their communion also made Catholicism sound rather silly and horrific at the same time. I get he was trying to scare the kids into not sinning with the timeline of how long burning in Hell for all eternity would be, but that was cruel and frightened me. It reminded me of an episode of Criminal Minds where this crazy spanish priest goes around murdering people for their sins because he thought that he was saving them from an eternity of hell. Additionally, I enjoyed how Anaya put the start of Tony's questioning "'What if I go to confession?' 'Then your sin is forgiven, your soul is clean, and you are saved-' 'You mean I can go out and sin...do a million bad things and then when I die I just go to confession and make communion, and I go to heaven?' 'Yes,' I said, 'if you're sorry you sinned-' 'Ohhhhh,' he laughed, 'I'll be sorry!...You know it doesn't seem fair.' No, it didn't seem fair, but it could happen." (Anaya 192) I never really understood that part of Catholicism. Basically they don't want you to sin, but it's completely alright if you do as long as you just are sorry. So if you regret your bad decisions, if you're sorry that you did them, it deems them as okay? I think it indeed is not fair. You are basically giving people the green light to do bad things. I enjoyed Florence, and I was upset when he drowned. He effected Tony greatly, and I think was a big cause of his questioning his faith.

I have to say I am happy this book is over. I wish that there had been an epilogue giving some indication of what Tony does in his later life, but perhaps Anaya couldn't think of anything that sat right with him enough to give to his readers. I like the explanation of Ultima, and I think her death was a good way to end the book. It made the world of Tony's seem at peace, as if he was ready to start a new part of his life. But I guess we will never know for sure.

Bless Me, Ultima: Chapters 13-16

This book and I are in an abusive relationship. One minute it's really great, and I want to read and never stop. The next minute I want to fall asleep because I'm in tears with boredom as it drags on infinitely, and I won't even mention that issue of some random language Anaya created and spontaneously threw in the text. Regardless, this set of chapters had my favourite passage of the whole book so far, and it will most likely remain this way. I loved the little play that Tony and his misfit, rowdy friends put on for the rest of the school. It was such a sassy mess, and I laughed at the poor teacher for how much of a joke her life is. It was like a nice little bonus from Anaya, as if he was saying, "Hey I can be fun and light-hearted in my writings about a small boy and his mess of a life." Then ten pages later Tony finds his brother in an awkward position and he witnesses death number two. Rudolfo Anaya, you are such a tease. The only humor in this book at all is with Tony's little gang. I love them all, especially Lloyd, who obviously going to grow up and sue everyone like all good Americans do.

But, sadly, the more meaningful parts to this book are also the ones that made me so tired. Tony's little dreams where he talks to God hold most of the books meaning. Personal moral conflict is turning out to be the name of the game in this story. The book started out with Tony's wondering if he was going to follow his mother or father's wishes, now it's becoming slowly more about his religious and moral beliefs. The most signifigant one is on pages 172-176, but one thing that really struck me was this "'You foolish boy, God roared, don't you see that you are caught in your own trap! You would have a God who forgives all, but when it comes to your personal whims you seek punishment for your vengeance..." (Anaya 173) What is Anaya trying to say about Tony here, and about religion in general. Is vengeance a basic human characteristic, if even a young and gentle child can feel it? Tony wants Narciso to be saved, but he wants Tenorio to burn for all eternity, and what does that really say about him. Does that make Tony hypocritical, or is he just basing this off of what the people in questions did wrong from his perspective? After all, both men only did what they thought was the right thing. If Tony wants vengeance on Tenorio for killing Narciso, why is Tenorio so wrong in wanting vengeance on who he thinks is his child's murderer? I feel bad for Tenorio. Dead kid, another one who is probably going to die and he's blinded in one eye. That is rough. I don't really know where this story is going, but all I want at this point is for Anaya to tie up all the loose ends.